Our Experience of the Dummy Fairy

I’ve decided to write a post about Monkey giving up his dummy because when I first started looking for ideas on how to do it, I was surprised by the lack of information or experiences I could draw on. So here is our story…

When Monkey was two days old we decided to give him a dummy for a number of reasons, yes it was easier and yes I needed sleep (he’s always been a great sleeper). I also justified it partly on the suggestion at our NCT classes that it could help reduce the chance of cot death – although I am not sure how much merit there is in this although they do give premature babies dummies.

I know there are many parents out there who chose to do the same. I also appreciate that many don’t and I have a number of friends in this camp. Its an individual choice and I completely respect both alternatives.

However when you choose to – how do you then get rid of it? Monkey will be three next month and I would like him to be without it by then. However he has appeared in the last few weeks to be more attached to it than ever! Requesting it at other times of the day instead of just at bedtime or nap time.

Initially the Easter Bunny was going to take them away, but it transpired we were staying with relatives over the Easter weekend so it wasn’t really practical. If I’m honest I wasn’t ready to give it away either. Taking it away makes me feel mean, he uses it for comfort, so its not just a dummy I am taking away from it, its the comfort too – I needed more time to get my head round it.

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We thought doing it over Bank Holiday weekend would give us more time if the adjustment was going to be difficult. So on Saturday night we decided to go for it and this is how we did it.

  • We first mentioned a week or so ago that the Dummy Fairy would be coming
  • We took the tact that she was going to take his dummies to give to the babies, as he is such a big boy now and doesn’t need them anymore.
  • There was a promise of a ‘surprise’ left by the fairy in exchange for the dummies
  • Saturday night before bedtime Monkey helped us gather all the dummies up including the one in his nursery bag and any that had fallen down the side of the bed – he placed them on the hearth
  • Monkey went to bed as normal, after story time he was reminded of the impending fairy visit
  • I wrapped a carefully chosen present and added a certificate from the fairy and placed these in the spot the dummies had been put. I added a sprinkling of glitter as ‘fairy dust’
  • I threw all of the old dummies away – I found this a little difficult as it appears Monkey wasn’t the only one who had grown attached, I picked his favourite one to go in him memory box

Dummy Fairy Gift

I should say here that Monkey also has a muzzy which he takes to bed with him. On Saturday night the promise of the surprise was enough to keep him happy, he went to bed at the normal time, yet he didn’t go to sleep straight away as normal. We could hear him singing and talking to himself, although happy he didn’t settle for a whole hour.

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Sunday morning he was really excited about the present. We chose something that he’s specifically into at the moment, and significant enough to be a reward – we wanted to make it a big deal. In this instance a Disney Planes Fire and Rescue Blastin Dusty Toy (affiliate link) He is really into Planes Fire & Rescue so this worked for us, it normally retails at £49.99 but amazon are selling it at the moment half price with free delivery so it met the budget too. Its not left his side since. Sunday nap time he asked for his dummy partly force of habit partly trying it on a bit.  We reminded him of the fairy and re-read his certificate to him thankfully there was no tantrum. You could easily put together a hand written note, I was up against it time wise and brought one from Etsy here. Nap time went well. Sunday night we stayed with relatives and made sure he was absolutely worn out by bedtime, because he was so tired he just dropped off. He didn’t even mention it when it came to nap time today.

All in all he’s been amazing about it – there haven’t been tantrums or melt downs. He’s taken a bit longer to fall asleep in the evenings and was still a little unsettled tonight. But I have genuinely been surprised by how well he has taken to not having it, which actually makes me feel less guilty about taking it away in the first place!

Our Key Learns

  • Actually maybe I was more attached to it than he was
  • Both of us were joined up on our messages to him, as were other family members
  • We have given him a bit more support and attention at bedtime
  • We have not mentioned dummies once to him unless he has asked for it
  • I have pre warned nursery so they can also do the same

Mudpie xxx

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what katy said

29 Comments

  1. Kate

    Such a great idea and it sounds like making the extra effort made the transition easier for all of you! Back when my older two had to give up their dummies I think we just told them they had to give them up and gradually took one away at a time until there was none left – it didn’t work too well though lol.

    I will keep all this in mind for when E gets to that point so thank you for sharing your experience. X

  2. Kelly

    I’ve always liked the idea of the dummy fairy – my daughter is only 7 weeks old, but it is something I already think about. It sounds a lot easier to do than getting rid of a thumb though (speaking from experience as I was a thumb sucker). #twinklytuesday

  3. Katie (Growing Up KaterTot)

    That transition couldn’t have gone any smoother! Good planning made all the difference. You’re a great mom!

  4. Louise (Little Hearts, Big Love)

    That’s brilliant – well done Monkey and sounds like it was a very successful visit from the dummy fairy. We did something similar last Christmas – I prepared Jessica for the fact that once the tree went up, we would be hanging the dummies on the tree for the baby reindeer so that they would sleep well on Christmas Eve and their mummies could leave them with the elves and fly the sleigh for Santa. She still talks about the baby reindeer and how they have her dummies but as with Monkey, the transition was smoother than anticipation – it just took a little longer for her to go to sleep for a few days. I wish I’d thought of doing a thank-you letter though like your certificate from the dummy fairy – that sounds like a great idea.

  5. Unhinged Mummy (aka Janine Woods)

    I am dreading this moment so thanks for the tips. My little one is only 26 months old so not too worried at the moment but she is very very attached to hers. I plan on doing similar to you when the time is right. I was thinking about introduction ing the dummy fairy when she is too but I may wait a bit longer depending on what her understanding is like. I think it’s important that she is able to understand what is going on in order for the transition to be a success like you have done. Some great advice in this post.

    #kidscorner

  6. Unhinged Mummy (aka Janine Woods)

    Whoa! Forgive all the typos and spelling mistakes there. Been up half the night and my little one is 16 months not 26 months!

  7. Eimear

    Great idea I never thought of the dummy fairy! We sent out lady’s dummys off on holidays to spain, she didn’t mind one bit but there were a few nights afterwards where we had to go into settle her, great to be rid of them though, the stress when you go somewhere without one or a shop nearby is not worth it! #kidscorner

  8. Rochelle Williams

    Such a brilliant idea! I’d never thought of this before. Marley is nearly one, I’m going to try and take it from him cold turkey after his birthday. I want to do it before he’s old enough to start asking for it. If this fails I’ll definitely be trying this when he’s old enough to understand! Xx

  9. Becky, Cuddle Fairy

    The dummy fairy was a genius plan! He’s done so well because you had a great plan and he was ready. If you had tried six months earlier, it may not have gone so smoothly 🙂 #KidsCorner

  10. Everything Mummy

    My eldest had a dummy till she was about 2 ish she started getting really attached to it which is when I decided it was time for it to go. I gathered them all up one day and binned all but one the one I left cut a split in so when she asked I gave it to her as normal and she said it was broken I said oh no it’ll have to go in the bin then so she put it in the bin and never asked again lol! I thought id have a huge fight on my hands and built up to be so much more in my head but she really wasn’t that bothered. Thanks for linking up to #kidscorner

  11. stephanie

    I remember when I was younger I had a dummy, I gave it to the sheep that sat on a roundabout outside my house. random right?! It’s lovely that you made it into a little story for him. xx

  12. Caro | The Twinkles Mama

    My bestie packed up my goddaughter’s dummy and took it to a red post box for her to post to the ‘Dummy Fairy’!! She was three at the time and I think, because she’d watched it go in the slot, she understood that it had totally gone!! She asked for it just once more and upon being told ‘it’s gone to the Dummy Fairy, don’t you remember?’ she never asked for it again!! 😉 Thanks so much for linking up with #TwinklyTuesday x

    Caro | http://www.thetwinklediaries.co.uk

  13. Katy (What Katy Said)

    So glad you have written this as I am going to reach this point in a year or so. I think I will find throwing them away hard too as I will worry she will need them! Glad it has all worked out fine for you. Thank you for sharing in #KidsCorner x

  14. Katie Haydock

    What a brilliant idea! I love the idea of the dummy fairy leaving glitter behind. This is so magical.
    He probably did so well with the transition because you were so consistent and comforting.
    A job well done and one for me to save for later use.
    #twinklytuesdays

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