This is not the post I intended to write tonight and as ever its normally fuelled by something which has happened in the day to make me want to write something that is free flowing. (Apologies if the words fall over each other). This is not a cultivated post full of information on a craft activity, day out or a product we have been lucky enough to review. Instead this comes from the heart.
Tomorrow is Monkey’s last day at nursery, he started aged 14 months after a rather disastrous relationship with a childminder (we were very unlucky). That is a story for another day probably when I have had a couple of glasses of wine meaning that I won’t hold back or be politically correct about the woman who made me feel as though we were raising the next moors murder! I honesty can’t believe that we have reached the end of an era almost exactly three years later and this mini human is now a proper little boy, no longer a toddler, no longer a preschooler but a child who is just about to take his first steps into ‘big school’. So here is my letter to my darling first born as he closes one door an opens another.
Standing in the cloakroom at your nursery today while you gave out a few small gifts to the carers that have touched your heart the most during your three year tenure. I was suddenly immensely proud of the little chatter box standing in front of me, of the fact that you can build loving relationships with people outside our family unit and touch their lives in a positive way, I know they will genuinely miss you. You did really well there were no tears, although I am sure they will come tomorrow as I know how much these people mean to you. And it may not only be your tears!
They have helped us shape and guide you into the little character you are. And boy are you a character! Fiercely determined never taking no for an answer meaning that whatever you turn your hand to in later life you will succeed at. Sometimes I forget this when I am chastising you for answering back. I am sorry. Ignore me and keep that determination and drive to achieve whatever you have set your mind on, it will serve you well even when there are days when it doesn’t feel as though anything is going your way. You will preserve and reach that whatever goal you have set your heart on. I believe in you.
We see in front of us a little boy that is loyal to his friends and very caring to all that he involves himself with. How often have people been amazed when they found out you were an only child (at the time) and marvel how socially aware and empathetic you are. I have no idea where the empathy comes from, but this makes me proud. Even when it means you fight off the child that was trying to take your little friends paint brush… and then immediately regret it and hold a cold compress to said child’s head for ten minutes! Be loyal my little man, its a quality which is sadly lacking in todays society. I hope you will be rewarded by finding friends as loyal to you as you are to them.
I am proud that you care, that you make friends easily and quickly. A skill which you have learnt over the last year or so. I was proud that you wanted to go on the ghost train without me, with your little friend you had made five minutes earlier. I would never have been so bold as a child, yet off you trotted excited for the little bit of independence I had given you. I must learn to let you have a little more independence as you grow. Something which is alien to me, bare with me though I will get better at it I promise. You see not that long ago you were a tiny baby that needed me at every turn. Now you are just about to start school, excited by the change and wanting to spread your wings just a little. You know what you want and are able to articulate it to all around you. Thankfully you still want cuddles every day and long may they continue.
I am proud of your lack of fear, you don’t see the potential danger in climbing a tree as high as you can go, jumping off the highest piece of play equipment or otherwise that you can find. Nothing stands in your way you see everything as a challenge that needs to be met head on. I am sure that will lead to broken bones at some point, but they will heal and I would much rather you approach everything with the sense of adventure that you have now.
I am proud of the fact that you are always questioning, looking for answers in everything, discovering and exploring the world around you. Your imagination growing every day as the stories and (rather bad) jokes come out one after another. You are secure in yourself, confident in your abilities which I know means those first days at school will naturally come to you. For this I am proud and grateful. Don’t get me wrong I am sure we will face challenges with starting school but should you feel a wobble, please be assured that we face them together as a family and you will be just fine.
I am proud to call you my son, I am proud that you tell me you love me every day and I am lucky that I get to do it in return. To my nursery leaver I love you and you make my life more complete than I ever could have imagined. You make every day special, thank you for the last four amazing years. I am looking forward to the rollercoaster that awaits us.
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