AD – This post My experience of the baby blues has been written in conjunction with Emma’s Diary. I have been compensated for my time. 

My Experience of the Baby Blues differed greatly between the two boys. First time round with Monkey I can not remember experiencing anything. I had a close group of NCT friends and we all kept an eye out for each other. However with Kipper its a period in time which still haunts me now. One where I lost my rationality and in hindsight if I had realised what was happening I should have reached out. Before I get on to my experience which includes a stint in Neo Natal Care.

What are the Baby Blues?

According to Emma’s Diary the baby blues can happen three to ten days after giving birth. They are totally normal with eight out of ten new mums experiencing them. Although we don’t know why they happen it is thought they are linked to the changes in hormone levels. Symptoms normally include being tearful, sometimes bursting into tears for no reason. Becoming overwhelmed or anxious. It is important to note that although the symptoms may sound similar to post natal depression. The baby blues are a lot milder and will clear up on their own. Emma’s Diary has some good information if you think you or someone you are close to maybe suffering from PND. It is important to note that PND can happen at any time in the first year after birth.

My Experience of the Baby Blues

I had my baby blues with Kipper while I was in hospital. After a long four day induction (yes he was my second) I finally gave birth early in the morning. My brith experience was very positive and you can read the full account here. We were discharged from hospital and settled down to focusing on being a family of four.

Unfortunately we did not stay at home very long just one night. Over night Kipper appeared to have something wrong with him often his lips would turn blue and he was choking in his sleep.  I waited for the midwife to come the next day but when she didn’t I rung in and was advised we should take him to A&E. Just to be safe. Knowing what we now know about the fact he had an under developed respiratory system which was diagnosed at nine months. I wouldn’t be surprised if it was all linked.

While in hospital…

However at this time we were unware and instead the doctor told us they wanted to keep him in to monitor him. Wanting to do what was best we agreed. He was taken into the Neo Natal unit. Which if I am honest was quite a shock. He was not  a small baby weighing 9lb 4oz when he was born. He looked like a giant compared to the tiny babies which were all hooked up to beeping machines. Obviously fighting for their lives. Trying to remain calm I said good bye to Hubby and Monkey and settled into a small room next door.

I was there for three nights and four days. During this time I was woken every three hours to feed. I had no emotional support. I had nothing to keep my mind active or focus on. Looking at the diary I wrote at the time I can see the downward spiral I was on. It was compounded by the fact that my milk had not come in due to stress and lack of sleep. I was for the most part inconsolable. Which for me is very out of character.

Pushed over the edge

The lack of control which I felt came to head when I finally fell apart over the phone to my husband on that last night. I was going to take my baby and run. I was determined to leave it felt like a prison break. My rational mind had disappeared and I was being fuelling entirely by emotion. For me (I was lucky) that was as low as it got. This was my baby blues. I didn’t see it at the time as I was so caught up in everything else that was going on. But looking back, the emotion, the tears, the overwhelm it was all there. It was amplified by not having anyone to talk to about how I was feeling.

The only way he kept me in that cell of a room was by promising he would arrive first thing for the doctors rounds. I should just say at this point the only reason we were still in was the fact that my milk still hadn’t fully come in. That night after being woken yet again I agreed to top up with formula as he had lost 9.7% of his original body weight. I felt like everyone was against me. My wishes. I just needed to go home and then I was certain my milk would arrive. I needed to sleep in my own bed with my baby next to me.

What happened after…

Thankfully with some gentle persuasion from my husband we were eventually allowed to go that next morning. He had seen something very out of character and something that really worried him he needed to get us home. Looking back on it now I still feel anger towards the whole process. It definitely did not help Kipper and I bond. I am lucky that I am pretty robust but if I had been a little more fragile. Who knows where that experience could have left me. Which is why it is so important to look after yourself. Both before, during and after having a baby. Emma’s Diary have some great information around improving your mental wellbeing during pregnancy and another on postnatal exercises.

Win a Mothers Day treat with Emma’s Diary & Bayna No. 1

It is important we share our parenting stories to help others going through the same thing. And also to tell everyone that we are GOOD mothers doing an amazing job raising tiny humans. To celebrate this and Mothers Day, Emma’s Dairy has teamed up with Bayna No 1. To offer my readers the chance to win a unique Russian Spa Experience for 2 in Central London. The spa is extremely popular with celebrities with both Kate Moss and Justin Bieber visiting regularly.

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The Giveaway

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I have some other giveaways running at the moment so please check them out in the Blog Giveaways Page above.

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My experience of the baby blues

58 Comments

  1. Priscilla Stubbs Reply

    I can relate to your problem with the baby blues. My great grandson was rushed into hospital at a week old with suspected meningitis and my granddaughter stayed with him. Being a first time Mum she was totally overwhelmed with the experience and even when they were out of hospital it took her a while to be her usual happy self.

  2. Julie Johnson Reply

    This will be ideal. I can have a bit of me time, travel to London and just chill

  3. Gervin Khan Reply

    This is such a great post and very much related to my own experience as a parent. Thank you for sharing this kind of information and experience that we cal learn too.

  4. My proudest moment as a mum is simply seeing my children altogether and thinking ‘I made them’ 🙂

  5. Good to learn about your story on Baby Blue, I thought it is the same as post-natal depression. Good to have an insight view on this topic.

  6. Watching my husband become a daddy and looking after us both when we had such a tough time in the beginning

  7. You’re definitely not alone in your experience! It’s so important to share this stuff so new parents know they’re not alone

  8. Rosemary Tily Reply

    Seeing my own adult daughters enjoying their experiences of Motherhood when my grandchildren were born and feeling very proud at being included in both the joys and concerns of those precious first years!

  9. Many of my friends have had their own experience after childbirth and beyond. Each one had their own experience and needed different solutions and ways out. There is definitely no set answer.

  10. I don’t have kids yet, but I’ve got friends who experienced the baby blues. I appreciate you sharing your story with us.

  11. Your stay in hospital must have been hard work – no wonder it got you down. I can remember being desperate to leave after giving birth, and was lucky enough to escape within 24 hours. Every hour I was stuck in there made me feel a little less human. Well done for making it through. Xx

  12. I know my daughter would do so well with a baby sister or bother but its just so hard to picture having two when she’s only 20 months old and cant talk sentences yet.

  13. I know so many people that experienced the baby blues. It’s something that’s actually so common but most don’t talk about it.

  14. I think it would have to be that I have good kids. They are kind, considerate and thoughtful. They are arty, one draws and paints, the other is musical. Both are avid readers. Both survived a mother who made mistakes.

  15. Proudest moment as a mum is when struggling with a speech delay he finally said mama

  16. For one of my kids, watching him join high school and waiting to see if everything we taught him would stick. We didn’t want a child bullied but we didn’t want a child who does bully. 1 year on and he’s in the popular group, in all the top classes and is king to everyone in his year

  17. catherine santiago jose Reply

    Thank you for sharing your experience with baby blues, me and my husband are very much related of this kind of struggle with a big smile in our hearts as we know it’s our blessing from above that is causing it. Loved it.

  18. Terrie-Ann Wright Reply

    raising £1000’s in memory of my hoy Jack who was born sleeping. Money that went to a number of charities to help other families suffering the experience of baby loss.

  19. When i brought my second son home and my 2 year old and he welcome him and brought all of his favourite toys.

  20. I’m so sorry you’ve had to deal with the Baby Blues. It’s no joke!

  21. Forgive me, I was a bit confused being that I’m not a mom. But you were referring to the sadness some feel after giving birth, correct? I wasn’t sure if it ws reference to thur condition your baby was experiencing wth blue lips. It’s tough being a mom.

  22. Petra Baver Reply

    My sister has post-natal depression but something switched after some weeks and she now loves being a mother and is expecting her third. It was a big adjustment but she now seems happier than ever.

  23. I really hope that come Mother’s Day, everything happening around us now are over and we can go back to our lives and enjoy and celebrate the day for us moms.

  24. With such an emotional experience no wonder that you didn’t feel like yourself. I don’t have children but I can imagine that for a new mom to have to take her baby to the A&E a day after he has been born is a horrible experience.

  25. What an experience you had. I really like here in Japan that the mother can stay in the hospital for one week just to get adjusted to the baby and also the hospital can check if the baby is ok in the first few days.

  26. i think it’s very important to talk about baby blues and be prepared on what to do if it happens

  27. Thanks for sharing this experience. This is helpful for someone like me who wants to be a mom someday.

  28. This is so emotional experience for all mother after or while giving the birth. Their struggle was there. I’m not a mom yet but I’ve learned to this post for my future.

  29. Bindu Thomas Reply

    Thank you for sharing your experience. This is very helpful for the mom to be ladies

  30. Proudest moment – way to many to count ! The best is everytime I get called MUM

  31. Caroline Cordery Reply

    I’m very proud of breastfeeding my two until 3, and home educating.

  32. Alison Clark Reply

    Im a single mum to a 14 month old – it’s been tough along the way but every single day I am proud of him and some days even myself! I think currently as he’s saying mumma more that makes me really proud.

  33. Rebecca Beesley Reply

    my proud mummy moment was taking my youngest home from hospital when she was born – I couldn’t stop smiling.

  34. Christine Hobbs Reply

    Nothing is ever the same once you have had one or more children. Even when they are grown up you never stop worrying helping and supporting them. Its the best thing in the world but hard work

  35. My proudest moment was watching my daughter give birth to my eldest grandson

  36. It took a while but think it has to be when my daughter learnt to swim. Will never forget her face!

  37. Kerry Smith Reply

    I’m always immensely proud of my twins. Every parents evening i just want to burst

  38. I’m always proud of my children they make me proud every single day.

  39. Leeanne Clifford Reply

    I had hideous PND with my son. My proudest moment would be too hard to think of. He’s always been so kind and easy going and I’m proud of him every day

  40. Chris hindle Reply

    My proudest moment as a mum was having my first and only child (boy)

  41. Natalie Gillham Reply

    My daughters have made me proud so often that I cant think of a proudest moment, but they continue you to make me proud every day in different ways as they are both lovely girls xx

  42. Darren Bourne Reply

    Our children do so much to make us proud it’s impossible to pick one.

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